“Aah!” DJ cried. “The insanity’s gotten you too?”

Joey avoided answering the question. “Where’d Kevin go?” he asked.

“Oh crap, he better not streak like Chris did!” Juliette said.

“No, I’m afraid it’s something much worse,” Chris said, and pointed.

Kevin walked up to them wearing a dress.

“’sup,” he said.

“Dude! Someone pinch me, I must be dreaming!” DJ said.

“Dude, if you were dreaming, I would be slightly concerned with you dreaming about me running around in the nude,” Chris said.

“Aaah! I can’t take this anymore!!” DJ said, and ran off to the beach.

“DJ, wait up!” Dina said, and ran after him.

The rest of the campers slowly went off in separate directions, until Kevin and Chris were left.

“Dude, please lose the dress. It’s a little disturbing,” Chris said.

“Disturbing, perhaps. Comfortable, yes. I feel so free in it,” Kevin said.

Chris just stared at him.

“I’m…uh…going to go see what Dina and DJ are up to…” Chris said awkwardly.

“I’m going to go show off my dress. Do my little turn on the catwalk. Yeah on the catwalk, on the catwalk yeah. I’ll shake my little tush on the catwalk,” Kevin said as Chris walked away.

“Seriously, dude! Creepy!” Chris called back.

Chris reached a tree near the beach when he saw it.

DJ and Dina stood, kissing.

Chris hid behind the tree and watched in horror.

Liam walked by Chris.

“Hey, Chris, have you seen-?”

“Shhh!” Chris said. Then he pointed to DJ and Dina.

“Oh man…it’s gonna be A Hard Day’s Night for you,” Liam whispered.

“What does that even mean?” Chris hissed.

“I don’t know. Catchy song though,” Liam said, shrugged and left.

Liam met up with the other four campers who were sitting outside the mess hall. Kevin was still wearing his dress. No one was completely sure why.

“Liam? Are you okay? You look a little off…” Curly said.

“Finally on Beatle overload?” Juliette asked.

“Nope. I won’t tell you what’s wrong, but it’s definitely not Dina and DJ kissing in front of Chris,” Liam said, and then face-palmed.

Joey and Curly gasped. Kevin and Juliette didn’t.

“Good,” Juliette said.

“What do you have against Chris?” Curly asked.

“Yeah, he seems like a pretty cool guy,” Joey said.

“Have you listened to him talk?” Juliette said. “SO annoying.”

“What are you guys all worked up about? Liam said that’s NOT what it involved!” Kevin said.

“You idiot! That’s what it DID involve! Liam just let that slip on accident!” Juliette said.

“…” Kevin gave a blank stare for a moment. “Holy crap! You know that we have to vote one of them off next challenge.”

“Campers! Report to the campfire!” Cameron announced. “To vote someone off!”

“I think we all know who’s got to go,” Juliette said. The other four nodded.

The eight campers sat at the campfire.

“You have already cast your votes. Now, some explaining is in order. You were all given letters this morning, in secret. In each letter was a secret dare. Let’s see, let’s look at Joey’s letter,” Cameron said, and then began to read DJ’s letter. “Dearest Joey, we have received hate mail regarding you remaining on the show. In order to remain on the show, fans have demanded you eat a spider on camera. Should you not, you will be kicked off of TDAI. THIS IS NOT A CHALLENGE. Also, if you tell anyone about your dare, or this letter, you will be kicked off as well. Your fellow campers have been instructed to act strange to make your spider eating seem less staged.”

The campers looked at each other.

“The rest of the letters were very similar. Of course there was no hate mail regarding anyone still being on the show. We just lied to you. It was a challenge. And now you have voted someone off.”

“Wait, what were everyone’s dares?” Kevin asked.

“Joey had to eat a spider, Curly had to drink from the toilet, Chris had run a lap around the island naked, Juliette had to eat dog food, Kevin had to wear a dress, Liam had to sing My Humps, Dina had to kiss DJ, and DJ had to fake like he didn’t know what was going on,” Cameron said.

“I’m just glad no one saw me kiss DJ,” Dina said. “It could have been horribly misinterpreted.”

The other campers looked away, some whistling.

“Oh no…” Dina said, and turned to DJ. “It’s gonna be you or me.”

“That’s right, Dina! You and DJ are the bottom two!” Cameron said.

Cameron tossed the other six campers marshmallows.

Dina and DJ looked nervous.

“And the person going home is…
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…Dina. DJ, you are safe.”

“I’m sorry, but this was clearly just a way to get me kicked off the show,” Dina said.

“If it makes you feel any better, I didn’t vote you off,” Chris said. “I voted off DJ, so that we could work this out.”

“Also, Dina,” Cameron said. “It wasn’t a way to get you written off the show. You were just unfortunate to have Chris and Liam see you and DJ. Chef Gerry, can we have a little help here?”

Chef Gerry appeared and carried Dina toward the Boat of Losers.

Chris ran after her, trying to kiss her goodbye, but he was too late. He fell into the water as the Boat sailed away.

He climbed out of the water, and then ran over to Cameron to attack her.

“How could you come up with such a cruel dare?!?” he shouted.

“Hey, whoa, whoa! Who said I came up with the dares?” Cameron said, fleeing from Chris’ attacks.

“Well, if you didn’t…then who did?” Joey asked.

“Him!” Cameron said.

A short figure, maybe 6 inches tall, stood on the Dock of Shame.

“Die,” it said.

“Oh no,” Curly said.

“Holy crap!” Kevin said.

“No *bleep*ing way,” Juliette said.

Carl the Tiki stepped into the light.